Hi, everyone! RaggedyAnndy here. I just updated our Other Awesome Blogs page. Added a bunch of new tumblrs to the list, as well as organizing the list, removing dud links, and so on. The newest ones are at the top. Check it out for more fat-and-body-positive blogs to follow, and please send us an ask if you know of one to be added to the list.
Practice, and a constant refrain of “fuck YOU fuck OFF motherfucker MOVE i am way out of your league” etc. running through my head.
Basically, fake it til you make it. Or the nice version, courtesy of Kyeli Smith - what you do will become true.
As flippant as that sounds, I’m dead serious. Practice. I spent time looking at myself in the mirror and reminding myself that I look a lot like many of the gorgeous fatties on blogs like this, and if I can think they’re beautiful, then there’s no reason I can’t be, too.
Deliberate media immersion is the other half of this - you’ve got step one by finding this blog. Follow us, follow fyeahchubbyfashion, follow…idk I can’t think of my favorite FA blogs right now, but find them, follow them, bask in a steady stream of images of fat people doing cool stuff and looking good doing it, roll around in those images and swim in them until they slowly, slowly, bit by bit by piece by minute by hour by day start to outweigh the counter-flood of negative representation in the mainstream media.
It will take time. It will not be fast or easy necessarily. There will be days where you genuinely rock the fuck out and strut down the street without even noticing if there are negative looks coming your way because you genuinely don’t care. There will be days where you’re telling yourself “head up, stand tall, fuck them if they don’t like you what does their opinion matter to your life anyway, pretend you’re walking hand in hand with [sexy favorite celebrity of your choice] and everyone’s just jealous” and forcing yourself to look calm and disinterested or happy or whatever image you want to project, while you’re just trying to hold yourself together inside. There will be days where you can’t manage even that much and hide yourself behind sunglasses and music playing in your earbuds as a barrier between you and the world. Even the most confident of us have those days too. Don’t beat yourself up for “failing” to be confident. Be gentle with yourself - you can’t hate yourself into happiness.
Any time you start talking shit to yourself, stop and ask yourself if you’d say that to your favorite FA blogger or fatshion blogger. If you wouldn’t, why not? And why are you willing to say it to yourself, then?
Time. Practice. Work. Positive media saturation. Sheer force of FUCK YOU. And lots of patience while you work through it.
Go forth and be the fucking amazing motherfucker I know you can be.
what's wrong with being chubby and having smaller breasts?
…no…thing…? I don’t think either the ask or my response said anything about that being a bad thing? But it’s a fact that a lot of people assume that fat = big breasts, and so it seemed worth addressing imo.
I've asked myself countless times, why there are so many fat women with small breasts? I thought breast tissue was basically fatty tissue.. so if you gain/loose weight, the breasts will be the first to gain/loose mass. I for one am a 40DD now that I'm fat. When I was of 'normal' weight (120lb) I had an 26 A-B breast. Or does this have to do with the different kinds of weight distribution? female (bust, ass, thighs), male (stomach)? Tumblr science people, where are you? :D
I don’t think it’s so much a gendered thing as it just is…body types. People have bodies. They come in all kinds of shapes and whatnot. My breasts did get somewhat bigger when I gained weight, but I already had big boobs to start with - 36DDD, now an F. Which is probably more genetics than anything - lots of large-busted people in my family. But even within the family, my aunties are fat with thin fingers and wear the same ring sizes they did when they were thin, while my mom and I gain weight all over - I’ve gone up two ring sizes between being 150lbs and 200lbs. And I’ve known people with the opposite, skinny with chubby fingers. And then there are people who are skinny with large breasts, to go back to the boob size question.
So I don’t think we need to involve science tumblr really. It’s just, yes, breasts are mainly fat, but one fatty tissue is not exactly the same as the other, and different bodies develop and add fat in different places for their own genetic reasons. For some, breasts will be the first place that sees a change in size with a change in overall body fat; for others, there won’t be a change at all.
Bodies, man. They’re kind of a trip if you think about it.
(Can we not with the “normal” weight thing though? Even in quotation marks like that, it’s still just a silly phrase. There’s no such thing as a normal weight. If a person weighs it, it’s probably basically normal for that person’s body. It seems like a small thing, but language matters - to define a single weight range as “normal” inherently marks anything outside those ranges as deviant and othered, which is how we end up with the whole fat discrimination thing. Change language, change the world. Though that may just be the ex-linguist in me talking.)